Ana Veciana-Suarez

The media is aflutter about a new study showing a growing number of women out-earning their husbands, a situation that has become more common in a recession in which men are losing jobs at a faster clip. There's even a catchy label to accompany the movement: alpha wives.

To which I say: Oh, boy, here we go again.

The story of breadwinning wives is the latest act in the work-family opera, an ongoing saga in which pundits perceive every morsel of news as a trend. Before alpha wives, we were consumed with women who were opting out of the job market. Never mind that this was a sliver of the female workforce. Never mind that most women have no choice but to earn a living. Headlines nonetheless trumpeted an exodus.

So now we have a reversal in the storyline. Stop the presses (or the Twitter updates): Some women are raking in more than their mates. This news isn't new, of course, nor is it surprising to anyone who's followed the steady rise of education levels and career opportunities for women. In fact, you might ask: What took so long?

Back in 1970, 4 percent of wives earned more money than their husbands. By 2007, that figure had climbed to 22 percent, according to a study released last week by the Pew Research Center.

Similarly, four decades ago, 28 percent of wives were less educated than their spouses, while 20 percent had more education. Those numbers had flipped by 2007: 28 percent of wives had more education while only 19 percent had less.

What has been lost in all this crowing about the new economics of marriage is a dose of reality.

Fact: The overwhelming majority of wives still earn less than their husbands, even when spouses have the same educational pedigree.

Fact: Women who do earn more don't conform to the media myth of the high-charging corporate lawyer married to the factory-floor supervisor. More commonly, neither spouse has a college degree, and the woman doesn't earn that much more than her husband.

But far more interesting than these numbers are the stories of couples navigating shifting social norms. Many are making their relationship work by dint of perseverance. They're adept at adapting, more interested in their personal pact than in how society views them.

Georg and Mercy, family friends, are the perfect example. She travels often for her job with Starbucks. He manages the family's residential real-estate investments, earning less but able to be around when their son comes home from school. He loves the arrangement.

"I'm very proud of her," says Georg, who predicts that more men, especially younger ones, will accommodate changing gender roles.

They'll have to. In the end, the rise of wives, as the Pew study is titled, will be less about earning power and more about marriages based on equality and flexibility.

 

©, Ana Veciana-Suarez

 

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