BioShock 2

BioShock 2 - Oh, hello there, Big Daddy. What a nice drill you have. Just one of the features in BioShock 2

Oh, hello there, Big Daddy. What a nice drill you have. Just one of the features in "BioShock 2"

What bothers me about reviewing "BioShock 2" is that everyone is reviewing "BioShock 2." No, really. Everyone is reviewing "BioShock 2."

Now I could make my review stand out by attacking the game so many have eagerly anticipated . . . so I will. Luckily for me there's a lot to be unhappy about with the sequel to "BioShock."

"BioShock 2" takes place about 10 years after the events in "BioShock" and you play as the first Big Daddy. Blah blah blah, who cares. Here's the deal. The big question that everyone had been asking since this game was announced was, "Can you make a true sequel to 'BioShock' without designer Ken Levine?" Well, turns out the answer is no. What you do get is a pretty damned good mod for "BioShock" and that's about it.

Let's talk about the gameplay first.

In "BioShock 2," you're supposed to be a Big Daddy and this is supposed to be an improvement over the rather lame Big Daddy sequence at the end of "BioShock." Well, the gameplay has been improved but, you still don't feel like a Big Daddy. The main character isn't painfully slow anymore but, you don't exactly feel very tough. You feel about as armored as you did in "BioShock," so get ready to burn through a lot of first aid kits. This is a bit disappointing as you're supposed to be wearing an armored diving suit.

Similarly the weapons feel like retextures of the first game's armory. While some items stand out -- like the gun that lets you hack turrets and security cameras from a distance -- others just disappoint. From the fights with the "Rosie" Big Daddies in "BioShock," I expected that the giant rivet gun would be a very impressive weapon. Once you start using it though, it turns out to be just as weak as the first game's pistol. In "BioShock," this weapon was killing splicers with one shot; in the sequel it's taking two or three to do and that's while using the lightning bolt plasmid to stun them. This was especially disappointing with the minigun. In place of the first game's Tommy Gun, you get a rather impressive minigun. Much to my disappointment, though, it deals about as much damage as the Tommy Gun did. Replacing the wrench with a giant drill was a nice touch though and a far more satisfying means of gory death.

The big change in "BioShock 2" is that now you can use weapons and plasmids at the same time. This really does nothing major as now you just switch between the two instantly rather than after a second delay like in "BioShock." Now if you can use both weapons simultaneously and effectively, then you'll probably love this feature. For me, though, it just proved a waste as I'd lose track of either my Eve or my ammo while holding down both fire buttons.

Oh, and if you're playing on the PC version, get ready to rebind some of those keys. The default key placement on this game ignores basic concepts like normal finger length. Apparently 2K Marin believes my thumb and index fingers should both be a full inch longer than is normal for anyone outside of a circus.

The overall effect was that I never really felt like the bad-ass Big Daddy I was supposed to be. I only got that effect after loading up on 15 different plasmids and unloading all of my ammo on the swarm of splicers that appeared every time my Little Sister started harvesting a corpse. The rest of the time I just felt like Jack.

The use of the Little Sister felt pretty good however. In those few moments where you get to protect your Little Sister from a horde of splicers, I actually felt like a Big Daddy. Though as you go deeper into the game you start getting attacked by super splicers who look less like residents of Rapture and more like leftovers from "Left 4 Dead." When this starts happening, the Big Daddy feel starts to vanish as you now have a real fight on your hands. I never had to use the Vita-Chamber in "BioShock," but in the sequel it's become a close and constant friend at times.

Part of what made "BioShock" so magnificent was my utter hatred of Ayn Rand and her crappy novel "Atlas Shrugged" (South Park was right for once and it really hurts me to admit that). If you've never read "Atlas Shrugged," but really liked "BioShock," then you're missing out. It'd be like watching a Mel Brooks film without having seen any of the stuff he's satirizing. Imagine watching "Spaceballs" without having seen "Star Wars." "BioShock" felt like a love letter of purest hatred for "Atlas Shrugged" and that was the magic. At one point in the game you meet Andrew Ryan face to face and he spouts utter nonsense about the nature of free will and what it means to be a man. And in response to this summary of Ayn Rand's message behind "Atlas Shrugged," you beat his head in with a golf club. I would like to think I'm not the only one who found that hysterically funny.

So, take that beauty and that depth and throw it away and the result is "Bioshock 2." It feels like an OK game or a great mod for an amazing game. It just misses the point and it feels like the development team knew it. They make up for it by telling you a lot about Rapture's origin and a lot of big questions from the first game are answered. For instance, how was Fontaine able to change his voice and what happened after Suchong died? The plot lacks a certain something and that something was game designer Ken Levine.

Sophia Lamb is no Andrew Ryan, and "Bioshock 2" is no "Bioshock." It's an average game and worth a rental, but it's not the work of art its predecessor was. Of course that's not going to stop it from winning a ton of awards and going down as 2010's game of the year despite 2010 having barely even started.

Sigh.

This review is based off a retail copy purchased by the reviewer.

Available at Amazon.com:

The Saboteur

BioShock 2

Video Games: BioShock 2